A great future starts with how you divorce
You only get one shot at ending your relationship. If this is your first, or even second divorce you probably don’t know how to do it. There’s a lot involved. More than you, and most everyone realizes. Unless your marriage was short and uncomplicated, you’re going to need help—not just with the financial and legal side but also, and especially with the emotional side. Your emotions are like a small rudder that steers a big ship…and steer they will.
When a meaningful relationship ends or when you are confronted with a divorce, it is hard to know where to start. Do you file papers first? Find a lawyer? Is a mediator better? What about all the emotional stuff? How do you help your kids? There are a lot of things to do and decisions to make and you only have so much bandwidth to make it all happen.
So the answer to the question, where do you start, is—let’s talk. No two people are alike and no two relationships are alike. There are many variables and each one factors in to knowing where, when and how to start. There is no formula for what is best for everyone. There is no one best way.
Some of the variables that will factor into the “right way” for you to divorce are:
- your ages
- length of your marriage
- dependency on one another
- financial picture/investments/retirement
- children or no children; ages of children
- emotional strength
- friends and family near
- how invested in the union you’ve both been
- balance of earning power
- how well you communicate
- level of honesty/trustworthiness
all need to be taken into consideration when determining where to start.